Ritual Basics: A Gentle Template for the Well-Seasoned Woman
“Hey Mom, light a candle for me today; I’ve got that big presentation.”
“Will do, honey,” I text back—before heading to my candle box to select one and pause for a quick ritual on behalf of my grown kiddo.
That’s really all ritual is: a pause. A moment of attention. A way of turning the ordinary into something extraordinary.
I like to think of ritual as an exercise or activity designed to make the ordinary extraordinary and/or intentionally amplify the meaning of a time or occasion.
Over the years of practicing what I call becoming a Well-Seasoned Woman, I’ve discovered the quiet, sacred goodness rituals hold—whether they’re simple (lighting a candle, stepping outside to notice the moon) or more elaborate (gathering friends for a seasonal circle). And if you’re thinking rituals sound intimidating, mystical, or “not for you”—I promise, they don’t have to be. They’re simply about presence and intention.
Why Rituals Matter
Here are three ways rituals have become a steadying force in my life:
1. Rituals help us navigate/surrender to change
Time moves forward whether we pay attention or not. One day slips into the next, and before we know it, seasons have shifted and years have passed. Rituals invite us to pause and honor what’s here now—welcoming the beginning of a season, reflecting at its midpoint, or marking a personal threshold. They help us stay awake to our own lives and remind us: change is coming, and I can meet it with both grit and grace.
2. Rituals restore our sense of wonder
In our modern, climate-controlled world, it’s easy to forget we’re part of nature. But rituals tether us back: lighting a fire in winter, eating the first strawberry of summer, naming the colors of autumn leaves, noticing the scent of rain. Rituals reawaken awe and remind us we belong to something bigger than our to-do list.
3. Rituals deepen belonging and connection
There’s comfort in knowing that across time and space, others are practicing something similar. Lighting a candle, walking a labyrinth, blessing a meal—these repeated actions connect us to those who came before us, those walking alongside us now, and those who will come after. Rituals affirm that we are not alone; we are part of a larger story.
Everyday Moments Worthy of Ritual
Ritual doesn’t need to be reserved for grand occasions. Here are just a few of the thresholds and moments that call for intention:
Seasonal thresholds (Spring & Autumn Equinoxes, Summer & Winter Solstices)
Mid-season festivals (Imbolc, Beltane, Lammas, Samhain)
Lunar cycles (new and full moons)
A new year
Life stages: menarche, menopause, milestone birthdays
Sacred dailies: affirmations, morning tea, prayer for loved ones
Any time grounding, clarity, or comfort is needed—by you or someone you love
Deaths, births, and rebirths of all kinds
A Simple 5-Step Ritual Template
If you’d like to try creating your own, here’s a gentle structure that works for almost any moment.
1. Create your space
Set aside time and minimize interruptions. Light a candle. Gather simple items that feel right for the season: a stone, a flower, a cup of tea, a photo.
2. Set your intention
Name why you’re pausing. It could be: “I’m welcoming autumn,” or “I want to release what no longer serves me,” or “I’m offering support for my child.”
3. Attune and orient yourself
Plant your feet, breathe deeply, place a hand on your heart and belly. Let yourself arrive.
4. Engage in a simple practice
This could be journaling, walking outside, preparing food, moving your body, repeating a prayer or poem, sipping a cup of tea, engaging in a yoga flow, creating art, or sitting in silence. The point isn’t perfection—it’s presence.
5. Affirm and seal the moment
Speak (aloud or silently) a closing affirmation, such as:
“I honor this time (right here, right now) and carry its wisdom with me.”
Staying Connected to Your Life
At the heart of it, rituals are a way of saying: My life belongs to me. I want to stay connected to every moment of it, on purpose.
They don’t need to be fancy, Instagram-worthy, or steeped in mystery. They simply invite us to live awake—to remember that ordinary moments can be made extraordinary when we approach them with intention.
So the next time you feel the pull to pause, light a candle, step outside, write a few words in your journal, or raise a glass with gratitude. That’s ritual, well-seasoned.
